Moments with Me

I'm a Recovering WANT Addict My pup Stout a few years ago I overheard someone say "I WANT that puppy!" when looking through photographs of puppies. The context was playful, because they do have animals of their own already, but expressed the words so as to emphasize the puppies cuteness and appreciation of them. This opened up an interesting point within me when I heard the words "I WANT that puppy!", the sound in which it was said together with the facial expressions. It took me back to my childhood as well as looking at myself, relationships and life in the present. I looked at how, as children - we were so quick to say "I WANT" due to not having any education / understanding of responsibilities and obligations tied to money and practicality. Interestingly enough, this is a hole we may be still fall into that we dig for ourselves to this day… Let me share and show what I mean with the above. The moment the individual spoke the...

A Journey with and through a Room How a room transformed me, my relationships and my life I am 31. This is my age, yes – but not my definition, my self definition. When you hear me, and within hearing me, also  know me – you will know that when I say “I am 31” I merely speak of age and time, not who I AM as a person within myself. I have for some time been exposed to individuals who define who they are according to age. “I am this / that age – I must be married, have kids, have a place of my own, be ready to retire…” and the list goes on… I oftentimes imagine seeing people who speak like this as a rat in a cage, running on a wheel – the wheel representing age and time, running in circles in their own minds and lives to catch up to time, yet not realising they are creating their relationship with time and age in their minds in the first place!!! Honestly, I have accepted and allowed myself to – (because of how some closest to me in my life, even those who I ha...

A Lesson with Nature: Moving with Awareness vs Memory Movement This video is based on the post below: Nature, me, music, pups keeping me company together with Kim Amourette...made for a great morning as everyone on the farm put in a couple of hours to tend to various farm projects and general upkeep. Fascinating also to observe the insect life while I was digging out the old compost around the immediate surrounding areas of the trees to prepare for new fresh compost to be placed...even had me a couple of good (meaning painful!!!) bites from some red ants. Taking me back to childhood memories of being unaware and sitting on a red ants nest lol Reminding me of practical awareness: to move slow, gently removing the old compost in such a way that I give myself and the insects the necessary space and time to move while for a moment having to disturb their habitat with the changes from the old compost to the new. I got bitten by some red ants because I was moving too fast while c...

Remaining consistent through the Ups and Downs Sometimes I've faced days where my general mood / experience goes through ups and downs. Other times my body goes through pains / discomforts (such as for example during periods / body not agreeing with food leading to nausea and diarrhoea / the flu starting to rear its head) leading to a physical experience of ups and downs during a day. Yes, we all go through ‘general’ ups and downs when it comes to your inner experience and physical experience during a day – but not to the extent where it influences / affects your daily responsibilities / priorities. Sometimes, it does occur that your inner / physical experiences affects your daily responsibilities and priorities; but most are in such a state of survival and dependency on work and money: there is no ‘space and time’ to ‘indulge’ in the inner and physical experience and so push through ‘em no matter what. Only giving yourself the time and space ‘allowed’ over weekends or...

When is enough, enough? One thing in most of my life has been a constant: creating consequence. There was always an imbalance in this relationship between consequence, LEARNING from miss-takes and actually CHANGING within myself. I own up to the fact that even still, to this day, I make miss-takes and it does sometimes take me longer to fundamentally change what is needed. I ‘know’ within myself I have the ability and capacity to implement this transfer from problem to solution, from consequence to learning to changing much FASTER…yet have still accepted and allowed myself to substantiate ‘problems and consequence’ more within myself. Not realising that, I will face resistance to substantiate / focus more on solutions, on the process of learning and actually changing. Why Resistance? With change comes Resistance – especially change from ‘bad to good’ for some reason. Meaning, I oftentimes ask myself: why is it sooooooooooooooooo EASY to participate in emotions, to create con...

Forgive and Forget When I was young, I took the words “forgive and forget” literally – where I actually tried to forget, completely erase a memory from within myself lol until I started understanding how memories in the mind and my relationship to them works. When I understood this, I finally understood the power I have when it comes to my relationship with myself, my memories and so experiences with others in my life. In this video – I share my process with the words “forgive and forget” and how the words have come to support me in changing myself and my relationship with others. 

The Simplest Moment making the Biggest Difference The following video is based on this previous video  

Is it possible for Stress to be Constructive?     The video below is based on the following post:     Took a moment to sit outside the doorway leading into the music / sound studio where I do recordings and videos for EQAFE. Can’t see here, but a gentle rain was falling, rain drops filling the air and blanketing the earth with a thin layer of water. After doing some recordings, I decided to take a moment with myself and nature, experiencing the new smells and sounds that come alive with the advent of rain. I realised when I was sitting there, breathing and having a moment w ... ith myself and the environment that it had started becoming natural for me to take moments throughout my day – even if only for a minute: to breathe, slow down, ‘gather my thoughts’ if you will…as I in the past tended to RUSH in my mind and so RUSH in my movements from one moment to the next, which eventually contributed to a mental and physical stress I was constantly in. With...

The Desire for Destruction vs the Credence to Create     Before watching the video below - please read the following blog, then watch the following video , as the video in this is blog is a follow up / continuation and expansion on the previous blog and video. Thank you.        

Do we really Understand and Live the Meaning of Creation? This video was inspired by and also an expansion of my previous post       

The Suppression Virus and an All Systems Meltdown  The video below is an expansion on the following post: My playful “whoops” face lol My laptop crashed recently due to delaying defragging and doing a general system clean up / all round check after my laptop showed some problems here and there. Even though I knew I had to do it sooner…I delayed the process for all sorts of reasons (or shall I rather say excuses) – all of which seemed valid in the moment (as it tends to go with the nature of excuses). So, I faced the consequences of my delays via excuses when my laptop crashed during a pivotal time with a few deadlines that were due.  This opened up an interesting point in relation to delaying important things, for example with the laptop: if I had made the time / created the time and space to get it done sooner I actually would have saved myself much more time. Not only that, but the defragging and general clean up / all round check also has to be done due ...

Why are we so willing to destroy and give up, but don’t have the equal / same willingness to Create? Yesterday I watched a couple of minutes of the final fight scene in the movie Superman: Man of Steel – specifically where they fight against and through the buildings, destroying anything and everything in their path. A point that came up within me while watching this scene in the movie was: “Look at how easy it is to destroy these buildings and if this were ‘real’ – how long it would take to rebuild all the destruction.” Obviously, such scenes are happening in real life – not as a fight between two supernatural beings, but wars in this world wreaking an equal amount of destruction and chaos of years of labour, blood, sweat and tears put into building infrastructure in countries. This lead me to question: “Why is life set up this way where it’s so easy to destroy – yet can take years / a lifetime to build / create something?” and “Why / how is it possible for one thing...